The small Zann Clip.

I was hoping the extra large would go over my entire know bun but even it is too small. I can use either the large or extra large to clip over half the bun taking it from the outside, through the middle and securing it that way. I’m a little disappointed but it still works.

As far as the Zann Clip in general, I really like them. She claims that they won’t leave a bump in your hair and they don’t. I put my hair up in the small clip when it was still slightly damp, wore it like that for several hours and had no bump. Also, it didn’t slip or slide out. It stayed exactly where I put it. Even the jaw clips with the “no-slip grip” slide on my hair. And it’s freshly hennaed too so it’s especially slick right now.

And lastly, some very weird pics from when I was shooting inside.

I have no idea how that happened. It looks like a double exposed piece of film, but this is from a digital camera….

Yemeni vs. Jamila:
Until about a month ago, I had never read Henna Sooq’s page on choosing the right henna. When I finally did read it, I found out that I should be using Yemeni henna rather than Jamila for the colour I’m looking for.

I used Yemeni henna for the first time over the weekend. The consistency and mixing the correct amount of liquid in (I didn’t use quite enough this time) will take some getting used to but I definitely do see a difference in colour. No more Cheeto affect for me!!!

I did a full application, as opposed to just the roots and my hair hasn’t felt this smooth and soft in a long time!!

Speaking of my knot bun, I ordered some ZannClips: an extra large one to hold it and a small one for half updos. Yesterday I got a call from Suzanne herself with a question about the sizes I ordered. Apparently there has been some confusion between the large and extra large and she wanted to make sure she sent the right one. Because I was at work and couldn’t get back to her quickly, she sent me both a large and an extra large at no extra charge. She also upgraded shipping to priority. I should have them tomorrow or Thurs. Now that’s customer service!!!!

I need to henna which I will do this weekend and then I will get pics of the cut and the ZannClips.

Ophthalmology:
I’ve been thinking about going to an ophthalmologist for a while now. There are times when my vision is a little blurry but there doesn’t seem to be any consistency in the distance. I think my eyes are just getting tired. Either that or I’m going blind!!! Also, when I’m tired and laying on the couch watching TV, I sometime have double vision. It’s like my eyes are too tired to line up right. If I sit up and look at the TV straight on, I can see fine.

I finally made an appointment for tomorrow because I woke up yesterday with my left upper eyelid swollen right along the lash line. Yesterday it was only half my eyelid but today it’s all of it. It’s itchy but tender to the touch too.

I don’t think it’s pink eye but we’ll see tomorrow. Hopefully there is a prescription to help my vision too.

Work:
AG called me today. She told me that she and JP got a letter from the company owner and Mr. HH stating that the employee hours–the total number of hours they can schedule everyone–has been cut drastically. My hours and The Boy’s have been cut from 40 to 36 hours a week (the upshot is that I will only have to work 4 days instead of 5). The next associate on the totem pole has been cut to 32 and The Boy’s GF has been cut to 10. This on top of raising everyone’s health insurance premiums a significant amount!!!

They also stated that JP and AG need to get the loss (shoplifting) under control or they need to “step down.” Yeah, OK, tell me how we are supposed to fix that.

I hate to stereotype but unfortunately there are a large number of people who would think nothing of slipping something into their pockets. We have a lot of those type people who are regulars. And if someone is determined enough, they are going to shoplift no matter what security measures we take.

The home office is comparing us to other stores in other (read richer, higher class) areas and we just can’t compete.

AG thinks the entire company is going down hill. I agree and I wouldn’t be surprised if they started selling off stores here soon.

I haven’t been very diligent about applying for new jobs with our living situation up in the air. I don’t want to get a job close to here and then move far away. But I’m going to have to start up again. As much as I am going to enjoy only working 4 days a week, I can’t afford to loose the pay.

Vel suggested a “rounded U” so I did a pic like that:

Looking at this, I like it better than the V. I think I will start with this and possibly some layers no shorter than BSL-probably longer. I can always cut a deeper V if I decide to and if I don’t like the layers, I can cut them out without loosing all my length.

Outside Kittehs:
We still have Mama and Unnamed. There is a new rather large white male that’s comes around once in a while and the neighbor’s cat–whom he claims is not his cat, although I know it is–has been spraying in our garage . I feel your pain Vel.

We think the neighbor’s cat, Gremlin, got hit or something. The whole left side of his head was raw and oozing puss. He let us catch him the other day and we trimmed the lose, matted hair and put peroxide on it but he hasn’t let us near him since. Can’t say as I blame him, that peroxide must have hurt on all that raw flesh but it needed to be done. He is acting like he feels better and, when we can get close enough to see, his face doesn’t look wet like it’s still oozing and he is using that eye too. I hope the one application did the trick because neighbor is not going to do anything .

Knitting:
My Nancy Feminine Tunic is hibernating whilst I finish a Palindrome scarf. Both my dress and semi-dress coats leave my neck exposed so I decided I needed a scarf right away. I’m about 1/3 of the way done with it.

Plan for the day:
I was supposed to got to the nearest army base PX with Shari (she is ex-military and her DH is active) but, because we were picking up another friend, it would have been a 4 hour drive rather than 2 1/2. Shari’s driving makes me motion sick and I’m told by multiple sources that the prices at the PX are not that spectacular so I just didn’t want to spend a total of 8 hours of Shari driving just to go to the PX. I bowed out but I had to tell her I was sick.

That kinda irritates me. With both her and AG, if I simply tell them I don’t want to ___, they get all “Aw, come on! Why don’t you want to go.” It’s easier to claim illness or some other more pressing matter. AG wanted me to go to the casino with her with my tax return money but I have no desire to go. I get the whole look at it like entertainment, you’d spend $XX.XX going to the movies thing but to me it’s just giving my money away. I don’t find it fun. But she bugged me all day yesterday about going and why I didn’t want to. It was not OK with her that I simply didn’t want to. I say TOUGH!

Anyhoo, I’m going to oil and braid my hair, bathe the dog–which is always a PITA–and then take my tax money to go buy a steam mop and possibly a stick vacuum for bare floors. I never feel like I get all the dirt up with just a broom.

It had already been a hellacious day by 8:00 when he came in and I was trying to stuff down some breakfast between customers. I wasn’t being very successful at it because I was taking a bite when he walked up.

He said: “No wonder you’re fat, you’re always eating!” (wait for it, that’s not all) then after a beat or two he said, “but I’d still f*#l you.”

I walked away telling AG she needed to finish ringing him out.

Later AG asked me what he’s said and when I told her she said she’d have made him leave if she’d known. I’d had time to cool down and had come to the conclusion that he hadn’t said anything different than any of the other obnoxious guys have. He was just more blunt about it. Well, the other guys actually find me attractive not fat but it all boils down to that they’d like to f*#k me and don’t have the class to keep it to themselves. I said as much to AG but she didn’t agree.

Funny, my horroscope (misspelled on purpose) yesterday on Facebook said It can be helpful to live in an illusion — keep yourself distracted by daydreams.

Hair:
I’ve always had a straight hemline, maybe a very slight U shape but straight for the most part. I’m starting to think about changing it to a semi-deep V ala Kimberlily and Aditi. It probably wouldn’t feel like sooo muuuuch hair and I could keep the length but it would make updos even harder. I don’t know if I could do my knot bun at all.

I’m debating the layers too. The only time I’ve ever liked them was when I was blow-frying my hair every day. What a PITA!!! Don’t want to go back to that for multiple reasons, not all of which involve my hair health!

I wonder if my curl would come back….

I’m looking for a pic that I can edit into what I’m thinking. I’ll post it if it comes out.

Four Weeks on LDN:
I slept through the night last night….

Otherwise, I really can’t a difference because I really need to go see Dr. B.

Knitting:
I forgot to mention, I finally started knitting again. I’m working on this sweater. I’ve almost gotten up to the armhole on the back piece.

Had a very bizarre dream sleeping on the couch last night. Sk8er Boi and I bought a house and were discovering all kinds of things that needed repaired or changed. For example, there was no window at all in the kitchen–there was a huge space for one, just no window.

There were stray cats everywhere; 20 or 30 of them in all kinds of strange colours. I remember purple ones with black leopard spots and ones that were navy, red and purple with black spots. Half of them were kittens and I wanted to keep them all!!!

Then there were all these neighbors having a party in our front yard and being very loud. Their kids were running around screaming and wearing costumes. I went out and said that this was my yard and to get out. They just laughed and went on partying.

Then Sk8er Boi asked me if I was happy and I said, “yes, why?” He replied, “because I don’t want any of this.” and went to bed. He meant me, the relationship, etc. I remember thinking that I would go spend the night at my mom and dad’s but then thought what’s the point, he won’t come after me anyway.

Then some weird guy whom I knew was some evil magical creature I needed to protect my house from showed up and we had a “battle” which consisted of flying across a long room that was empty except for unlit Christmas lights at each other.

Throughout the entire dream, I couldn’t speak (except for when Sk8er Boi asked me about my being happy). It was as if I had laryngitis; my mouth would move but no sound, or very little, came out.

It was just weird!!

Hair:
Lately I have been feeling like I just have too much hair. It’s in the way unless I have it up but there are only two way I can get it to stay up: a French braid or my messy knot bun. Thinking about cutting (yes, again) starting with mid-back but then I look at my profile pic and wonder if I would miss my length.

Maybe a hiatus from LHC would break that cycle, like Amoretti did. But then I would miss everyone’s blogs and I like keeping up with everyone’s lives and how they are doing.

Well, it’s only hair, it will grow back and my hair seems to grow faster than I thought. I’m already back to my pre-trim length from my last trim of 2.5″.

Houses:
I’m going to look into housing grants. Maybe enough just for a decent down-payment. More would be great but I don’t need more. Well, it would make going back to school easier if we didn’t have to worry about a house payment but there are people who could use more money more than me.

If anyone has any ideas about grant sites, I could use the help. I’ve looked and looked and all I can find are sites that want you to pay a monthly fee for their “assistance” which doesn’t consist of much but showing you were to look for available grants.

Work:
I have to work with The Boy’s GF tomorrow, just the two of us for four hours. I’m not looking forward to it.

She had to try to prove me wrong about a price in front of a customer the other day. It pissed me off but it doesn’t matter. If JP won’t do anything about the “firing offenses” she has committed, he would look at me like I was an idiot if I mentioned this.

I tell you what though, if she calls to say she is going to be late, I’m going to tell her not to bother showing up at all. I’ll work her shift and she can just be out the money. I don’t care if it pisses JP off.

Conversation between me and JP when AG and I worked day shift and The Boy and GF worked evening shift.

ME: I’m just wondering why it’s AG’s fault the cooler wasn’t done right when second shift is supposed to do it too.
JP: I expect more from you guys because you’re managers.
ME: if I’m a manager then so is [The Boy], he should have the same responsibilities as me.
JP: Yes, but AG is my assistant.

I left it alone from there. It doesn’t matter that AG could have stocked that cooler to the hilt, perfectly the was JP would have wanted it but customers bought it out and The Boy didn’t stock it or stock it well. To JP, it would be AG’s (an my) fault because The Boy can do no wrong.

Sk8er Boi was having body aches, chills and night sweats–where he literally soaked the bed through the mattress pad all the way down to the mattress. He started with it the day after Christmas for about four days, it went away and then came back about four days later. It got bad enough that he asked me to make a doc’s apt for him. All his doc said was that it was some sort of virus and would have to “run it’s course.” He didn’t offer anti-viral meds but I guess those are for more severe cases like H1N1. He hasn’t had a return of symptoms.

I’m sleeping better but not much. I’ve been falling asleep on the couch a lot, waking between 11 and 1 and going to bed. If I make it to bed before I fall asleep, there have been some nights that I sleep all the way through but they are still few. I woke this morning knowing I was having vivid and bizarre dreams but not remembering the actual dreams.

Work:
This situation with The Boy and GF is really pissing me off. They are allowed to do basically whatever they please and not even get in trouble! The other day, JP had to go to a manager’s meeting that he’d forgotten about when made the schedule. This left me alone in the store for an hour and a half. In that time I was supposed to wait on customers and get all the shift closure procedures done. The Boy and GF were suposed to be there at 2–they didn’t show up until 2:15! All JP had to say when I texted him was, “they will be there.”

A week or so ago, I came back from break and found GF scratching scratch-off lottery tickets. We are not allowed to buy scratch-off or lottery (like PowerBall) tickets from the store where we work or play them whilst on the clock. If we do so, it’s a firing offense. I told JP about it but, because he couldn’t see her do it on camera, he didn’t do anything about it. I guess my word is not good enough.

I’ve also noticed that AG gets blamed for a lot of stuff that The Boy should have done. The other day, she and I worked day shift and The Boy and GF worked the evening shift, the next day I worked the day shift with JP. He said something about the cooler being a mess and that AG didn’t do a good job. Well, The Boy should have stocked it on evening shift but does that count? NOOO! It’s automatically AG’s fault because “AG is my assistant.”

I’m letting it get to me. I shouldn’t but it’s just wrong. You know if I started showing up whenever I felt like it or scratching tickets on the clock, I’d be in a great big pile of sh!t for it!!!

I need to get out of there!

About the gift from Shari:
For the record, I DID NOT, HAVE NOT insisted that she take the necklace back. The only thing I said to her was, “I can’t accept this, it’s too much.” As Vel said, she over rode my objections and I have the necklace in my possession. I was not ungracious about it.

The main reason I was writing was because of the way I feel about it. I do feel guilty because I know that they need that money–or will once the settlement money is gone. Yes, I would feel best if she returned it and kept the money but I did not say that to her!

Anyway, Shari just got a respectable amount of money for a worker’s comp settlement. Yesterday, she met me at work at the end of my shift and gave me a late Christmas/thank-you-for being-my-friend gift. This. I know that cost of living differences my make this seem reasonable to some but $100 is way too much IMHO for her to be spending on a gift for me. Especially since she is unemployed and the settlement is not that large an amount. She’s going to burn through that money in no time the way she’s spending!!

Besides, she does not need to buy me gifts to keep me as a friend. She mentioned it’s from the “forever collection” because she “hopes we will be friends forever.”

I told her all of this and tried to leave the gift in her truck but she carried it into my house for me.

What would you do? I feel so…guilty is not the right word but it’s the only one I can think of…about it that I haven’t even taken it out of the box let alone contemplated wearing it!! I would would really feel best if she returned it and kept the money!

Cone Head:
Poor Rajah, she has a spot on her face that she has rubbed raw and one on her foot that she has licked raw. I can’t get a bandage to stay on her head and she keeps pulling the one off her foot. I finally broke down and bought a cone.

Poor baby, she’s actually adapting to it rather well but still….

The first one I tried was supposedly into combining Eastern and Western medicines. I’m all for that!! However, I was sitting in his waiting room for a follow up visit (my third, at $30 a pop for co-pay) when I witnessed three different people purchase the very same supplements–expensive supplements!– he had given me and told me were specific to my FMS. Two of these people were men walking in just to get more supplements–I know there are men out there with FMS but they are so few and far between that I can’t believe these two men both had it. The third was a new patient. I was also at just the right angle to see inside the supply cabinet. It was full of the three supplement I was “prescribed” and little else.

It became apparent to me that he was just in it for the supplement sales. I got my co-pay back, walked out before my appointment and went on the hunt again.

The second doc I tried was recommended to me by two people at work. I walked in and the minute the receptionist realized I was a new patient, she started touting the doc’s virtues. He was “just so wonderful.”

In my appointment, I explained my FMS diagnosis and why I was not on any meds for it. He didn’t listen. He sent me away with an order for blood work and a prescription for an anti-depressant, sleeping pills, muscle relaxers and pain pills.

I did go for the blood work but didn’t fill the prescriptions. I had to have the blood drawn in his office but not on that day. The nurse tried to talk me into the same freaking pills and when I called for the blood work results, the receptionist tried to talk me into them too. I told her that her precious doc prescribed those effing pills simply because they are standard for FMS and that he hadn’t bothered to listen to a word I said: I’d had them all when I was first diagnosed and they hadn’t done anything for me except make me feel doped up all day. My symptoms were not severe enough to need them. I told her I hoped she and her doc had a happy life together but that life would not include me as a patient, I was going to find someone how actually listened to me.

Then I pulled Dr. Z’s name out of the provider book. Third time is a charm I guess. Dr. Z listens to me, does not push drugs on me that I don’t need, is in fact happier the less drugs I need and is happy to work with me on things I want to try. The LDN is a great example. Dr. Z goes out of her way to help her patients and she doesn’t prescribe things just because she gets a kick-back from the drug company.

I don’t know why I just wrote all this down but I did, so here it will remain.

Outside Kittehs:
Mama and the Unnamed black one are still around. Mama is finally using the house occasionally and we have a radiant heater set up in the garage with a blanket next to it that we’ve found both of them sleeping on and different times. I wish Mama liked Unnamed, she is lonely without the others. I never have figured out what happened to them.

There is a new one we have spotted; a rather large all white one. This one has learned pretty quickly that our house is the house in the neighborhood. I found him/her in the garage yesterday. It’s still pretty scared of us and tried to run out when I came in but I was blocking the exit. I put food out and left whilst it was still in there. I hope it ate and settled back in. It’s currently 0º F with a wind chill of I don’t know how far below 0º….

Commies:
for my own records, they arrived this morning

One week on LDN:
some things I’ve noticed so far:
*These last couple of days at work, I’m not walking out the door at the end of the shift feeling like I was run over by a freight train.
*mild…ah…digestive issues. This, however, is nothing new. I’ve had bouts with IBS since I was diagnosed with FMS in ’98.
*I’m not sleeping. I’ve been waking up in the wee hours of the morning and not being able to do much more than doze until the alarm goes off. This is not something new either. I go through phases like this often.
*no vivid dreams which is a noted side affect. I have weird and vivid dreams anyway but I can’t remember having one at all in the last week.

Hair:
Something needs to change. My bangs are to my chin which means that they go up in any updo and don’t casually and artfully work themselves loose. This is good for work, I hate having my hair in my face there, but it basically means that the current cut is a PITA because of all the different lengths. That’s it, no benefits to it at all.

I don’t know what to change. Cutting comes to mind, of course. But then, so does growing the front out again.

I’ve been spending less time at LHC lately and I don’t have that, “Oh (insert deity[s]), I just can’t cut my hair” feeling. I don’t know if I would be happier with it shorter. If I go much shorter, I wouldn’t be able to put it up in my favorite knot bun, but anything past armpit length, IMO, is too long for just a pony tail. The pony just gets all messy and I might as well be wearing it down for all the protection it provides. And I don’t want to French braid it every. single. day!

Work Stupidness:
We have an associate who is now dating The Boy. I don’t know if they started dating before or after she got hired but they certainly knew each other before that.

Anyway, it turns out she is a pathological liar, probably a thief, a manipulator and just a plane old skank. I could regale you with stories about her but I won’t. suffice it to say that even JP suspects her of thievery, so much so that he spent the better part of one day watching camera footage trying to catch her at it. She’s apparently very good at hiding it.

However, JP will not fire her!!! He says it’s nearly impossible to run the store with one fewer person. We have enough on her to fire her without catching her stealing but he won’t do it. He says he’d get “crucified” if he did because he’d then need to give the rest of us overtime.

Tell me, if you were in charge, would you rather have your manager keep an employee who is regularly late to her shift–usually over an hour late with lame or no excuse–and you suspect of stealing what adds up to large amount of cash, cigarettes and other items. Or would you prefer he give his good employees overtime whilst he looks for a replacement?

It doesn’t matter, if JP had been on the ball about hiring someone earlier–he really needs three more if he’s going to get rid of her–we wouldn’t be in this situation in the first place.

(topic change but still about work)

I love our deli manager. She’s blast and we have a lot of fun but sometimes she can be so closed minded she pisses me off. One day, a regular customer said something about not being Christian so Dec 25th really didn’t mean much to him. He had celebrated Winter Solstice. After he left she made a comment to me about it. This guy was also her neighbor and she really liked him but the fact that he was not Christian totally change her opinion of him as a person! He stopped coming in shortly after that.

The other day we were horsing around and the conversation turned to hom*se*ual relations.

Me: don’t knock it till you try it!
PM: I don’t think so!
Me (still joking around): Aw, come on PM, why not?
PM (perfectly serious): Because I’m sane!!

Um, excuse me but what does sanity have to do with se*ual preferences???

Yeah, closed minded much?

Obviously it needs work but it’s live-in-able whilst the work is being done. The other houses Sk8er Boi was looking at as fixer-uppers were barely habitable.

It’s 6 miles closer to the town proper than the house I mentioned the other day. A fact Sk8er Boi gleefully pointed out. We went to look at the other house since we hadn’t seen it in the daylight and as we drive those 6 miles, I got more and more uncomfortable. It just felt like I was being cut off…. I say that and then, watch, I’ll end up in that blasted thing.

The other house is nice. We couldn’t see much because all the windows are covered but the basement is huge!!! It would need no work other than putting in stairs to the basement from the inside of the house.

I’m off to bed now, just wanted to post this for myself mainly….